Inches

It's May 2nd. Sorry, but the rough cut isn't quite done like I hoped it to be.

Moving kind of got in the way. I'm in a new house, still not all the way, but it's just really hard balance everything.

I think the 40 hour workweek thing is just really taking it's toll. I love what I do, but it can be hard stay on track. A full-time job really is full time. It's hard to make yourself work more when you come home at night, or work during your two short days of a weekend. There's not enough time to both work and unwind. If I want to watch a movie when I come home then that's pretty much my night.

There are also interesting crossroads when I have to actively look at giving more to my job or to myself. Because I have a creative job and I have opporunities to excel and push myself to do cool things, but a lot of those things would need more time and attention than what's available in my work week in order to do right. So I have this internal struggle where I basically have to keep myself from going to far in one direction and abandoning the other.

There's also this weird element to it where I feel like I'm becoming a really great graphic designer, but I have a little bit of resentment for it because while it is creatively fulfilling and something I enjoy doing, I know there's something better that I want even more. And sometimes I feel guilty for not being able to spend as much time doing film and getting as much practice in with that as I am in design.

But it comes back to money and the reason I majored in design in the first place. It's where I can get a job. And in having a job I've really come to better understand how people can settle and commit to one thing for money in life. Not that I'm falling that way, but it just makes more sense to me than it used to. I get it. I see it.

But alas, progress is being made. I haven't tallied the numbers yet, but I think I'm remarkably close...probably somewhere in the realm of 15 minutes or so left. And I'm about to work again now...I've given up on deadlines, but I'd really like to ship off a cut to my post team next weekend.