Getting Used to Rejection

Been a while...

Premiere likely in April in Shreveport. Not confirmed yet, so I'm not making any official announcements.

I'll probably shoot to have the DVDs ready at the premiere too. Get those out and the premiere out of the way in one fell swoop.

I hate to say it, but our festival run is looking bleaker and bleaker. Yes we still have 10 or so left to hear from. But we've been rejected from a very diverse group of 5 festivals so far. There's hope, yes, but I'm looking at April as the big hoorah.

I really wanted to premiere at a festival, but we've passed the notification date on the last one I was holding out for with no luck. It sucks because festivals are the reason we didn't premiere 3-4 months ago, when it may have been more appropriate being the holiday season and the one year anniversary of the shoot. By all means the cast/crew don't deserve to wait this long for it, but I was really trying to make it special. Then with a festival screening under our belt, our Shreveport run would have had more credibility, probably could have squeezed more screenings out of it. Would have stood out more.

But the fact of the matter is the movie isn't as good as I wanted it to be. And that's a very difficult thing to wrap your head around. Expectations are tricky. By all means, for what we had and what we did with our limitations, and even probably what we did as far as any project anyone involved has done is concerned, we did a great job. I'm proud of it. But the trick is comparing what's good for you, or what's good me, versus what's good for the collective filmmaking community. We're way behind comparatively.

Well, maybe not. That's the catch too. With festivals you're either in or you're out. You don't know how close you get. I've heard through the grapevine that at least one programmer at SXSW loved it. But we didn't get in. We might have been really close, but that doesn't help us. What was holding us back? Technical stuff? Maybe. It's up to me to figure that out and then turn around and try and do better.

At this point it's been a year and two months since we shot GOS. I've had 14 months to contemplate what we shot and mull it over and make it into the best it could be. And 14 months to find the faults and consider alternatives and dream of the next thing on my list and how I'll make it better. 14 months of thinking about the next project, and not being able to start it because I'm committed to this one. As much as I know everyone wants to see, I'm ready to be done with it.

Is that a terrible attitude to have about your own work, and the work of your peers. Probably. I see it as realistic. I don't dislike GOS at all. Like I said I'm proud of it. But I feel like I'm moving at super speed. I'm ready for something new. Trial and Error. I can't correct my errors if I don't keep trying. So you'll have to forgive me if I don't exude delusions of greatness when the premiere comes about, but I'm not the kind of person that lets myself be blinded by my own ambitions to be a good director. I know it takes more than telling yourself that and making yourself believe everything you do is great. I crave growth and second chances. I like moving on. I like change. That's part of why I like filmmaking. It's something new every time.

It's worth noting that I am finishing up the "Making Of" documentary and in some ways it's almost as interesting to watch as the movie itself (most of what's been completed is available to view online already). Maybe I'm just a little vain and like seeing myself as a director and hearing what I'm like on set...because when doing it, I had no idea. I'm glad we have the process documented. It's always neat to look back at yourself in stressful times doing weird and unique things.

Here's something.

I feel like I need to say something about the movie, but I don't know what I'm going to say yet.

I got the HDCAM and Digibeta copies of the movie in. These only exist for the off-chance that we end up screening at a festival. They require these formats for exhibition. This or 35mm, which would be awesome, but I can't afford that yet.

Speaking of festivals, those are curious things. Some really good stuff comes out of them, but a lot of awful stuff does too. A lot of awful stuff. I'll be heading up to Sundance in a few days to get a glimpse at the competitive landscape, but I already know what a lot of the films are like. This will be my 6th and final voyage to Sundance (unless of course I'm accepted in the future).

I saw Tiny Furniture the other day. In a lot of ways it's sort of a sister project to GOS. It was shot at the same time as GOS with a similar budget, cast/crew of friends, with the same exact camera (significant because it's a new workflow, the camera had been on the market for two months when this project was shot) and set in the writer/director's parents house. The director is the same age as me. Their turnaround was much faster though. This movie was conceived in November, shot in December, and finished in January. It premiered at SXSW last year and won the best narrative feature award scoring it distribution with IFC. Now the director is developing a script for producer Scott Rudin (the guy who produces everything) and is working on an HBO series with Judd Apatow...so I saw the film knowing all of that so as to sort of measure our potential in comparison. I couldn't believe how bad it was. I know a lot of people obviously loved it, but I was surprised. It was rough. In the same sense that GOS is rough. There are times when the script is a little sloppy or when the acting is a little off. There are lots of long rushed takes (though in my opinion, much duller cinematography). I just don't get it. I mean granted we still have a long ways to go in our release (we haven't even heard from SXSW yet), and may see much success, it's just weird to me. It's nice to see that something so similar can have such a good run. That people can recognize the potential in a rough but ambitious project from a young filmmaker.

I guess I should be glad that I don't see myself as being very far from these measures of success, but it frustrating in the sense of trying to figure out what's missing. The fact that their project took all of 3 months from start to finish is a bit frustrating. It kind of makes me feel like I should be dishing out more content since I do have this cheaper workflow. And maybe I will. Not that I believe in needing to follow some sort of model. One of my conundrums in trying to pick what's next is trying to decide what kind of project to do. Like the scale of the production. Part of me wants to keep challenging myself with something bigger. Part of me wants to go smaller and really knock it out of the park. And part of me wants to do the same thing again, but with the experience I gained from GOS. Try and master something at that scale.

The tricky thing about making movies is that you always think you've made your best, and you may, but it's the damnedest thing to try and objectively compare your film to others, to gauge your own abilities. And it's difficult to come to the realization that although you put everything into a project, at the end of the day you've got to wake up and do it again and do it a little bit better. It's easy to think in retrospect how success is about a career of consistency and growth, rather than one shot. But movies are very hard to make, and each shot means a lot.

With my luck some festival programmer is probably reading this and deciding not to program GOS because there's a good chance I'll be back with something better. And they'd probably be right.

Is there music in space?

Here's a taste of composer Ben Clancy's incredible work on the movie:

http://noisysoundrelay.tumblr.com/post/2590737413/i-wrote-and-recorded-the-soundtrack-for-an-indie

These are all b-sides and outtakes as we don't want to spoil the final score.

But Ben deserves a ton of credit. His score glues everything together and he's worked on it for as long as I've been in post. That makes him the only other crew member aside from myself that's spent a year + on this project.

I just hope the movie is good enough for his music.

Getting Out of Space

So if you're wondering, we didn't get into Sundance or Slamdance. In some respects, that's to be expected. If you're really realistic and practical with your expectations, it's to be expected.

I'm not very realistic or practical though...that's why this movie exists.

We still have a lot to go, 11 more fests to be precise, but I guess to me this was one of the most important checkpoints to reach despite whether we got in or not. It was a point of validation. You're not supposed to let much ride on festivals, but for me it's a way of knowing if I'm making a certain kind of product or not. Odds are I'll probably never make a "Sundance Film," but I'll probably still try.

But I guess what I'm trying to get at is that now I feel like in some ways I can move on. When you're making your own film, you never really know what it is. The longer you work on it, the less I think you know. The more you change because the more you re-evaluate. Too much time to second guess. Too much time too look too much into too many things. It'll be a long time before I'll be able to watch GOS with a clear understanding of it.

In my mind Sundance/Slamdance was a litmus test. "Does this thing I did compare in any way that kind of material? Do I really know what I'm doing?" The answer to that specific test is no. In the grand scheme of things does it or should it mean anything? Not really. Except that I have more work to do...which is ultimately the best thing it could mean.

What's weird is how much I realized, once it was done, how much time I had spent with it, and more importantly why. I did too much, expected too much, and tried to cover up too much. What I set out to do was completely absurd. But I'm damn glad I did it.

Does this mean the movie's bad? No. Everyone I've shown it to likes it. Hell, the festival programmers may have even liked it...but you have to absolutely love it to show it. I don't even absolutely love it. I think it's the best thing I could have possibly made at that time in those circumstances. And I'm glad we all made it. It's good. I know the people who made it will be proud of it. And they should be.

And the way things have gone for me, it's possible nothing I make will ever be "good enough" for whatever my artificial standards are. But that's what keeps me trying again. I've taken the test, gotten my grade, now I'm ready to go study for the next one and see if I can do better.

"....wait...but none of us have seen the damn movie yet."

I know. I haven't forgotten. I'm being as strategic as I can. I don't want to rush it. It will premiere somewhere. There are two more fests I hear from in February. If neither of those accept it, we will likely move ahead with a late Feb or March premiere in Shreveport. I know my deadlines are ever shifting, but if we want a shot at a festival premiere we must wait. Unfortunately, getting declined is sort of a double whammy because it also means we have to wait longer to show it. We may do a cast/crew screening sooner, but I'd really rather do it all with an audience. One big bang. In the meantime I'll do my best to keep putting out behind the scenes videos on the website.

And you know...make some new stuff.

Ding

It's done.


Now all I have to do is:
Design the final poster/box art
Finish building the website
Get the imdb page finalized
Get an HDCAM and Digibeta copy made for fests
Finish cutting the second trailer
Cut the making of...put more segments online
Compile the other special features for the dvd (commentary, deleted scenes, etc.)
Create a press kit
Get buttons made
Get t-shirts online
Get limited vinyls of the soundtrack made
Submit to the next 9 festivals on my list...wait to here from them
Get dvds/blu-rays produced
Organize the Shreveport premiere/screenings
Restructure Moviesauce, LLC
Rebuild the Moviesauce Website
Get updated releases from the talent

Finish writing my next project...then make it...so on and so forth.

Just...a....little....bit....more

I think I'm done now. With the movie. Watched my "I think I'm done cut" a few hours ago, made a full page list of tweaks and tweaked them. I have a single sound effect to do for the moviesauce logo at the beginning...but that doesn't really count as "the movie."

And there's one track I'm waiting on from Ben which is just a refined version of the title song. So once that's done, I just got to pop it in and we'll be ready for business.


In the meantime, we're waiting to hear from festivals...first notifications come in December and I'll basically be getting a steady stream every month through May for various fests....Then there's a few month break (where I may be screening) and then I'll be hearing from the fall festivals.

In total I'm looking at submitting to 13 fests. We ought to be able to get into several of them. But they're basically all spread out over the entire 2011 calendar...so with any luck we'll be screening it in various cities all year next year...with a Shreveport premiere happening as soon as we have our first festival screening and the world premiere status is gone.

My marketing efforts are also about to increase...with festivals come press kits and promo materials. which means money on printing cool stuff like postcards and one-sheets (with hopefully a new/official design coming) and buttons and t-shirts and maybe even vinyl soundtracks as I've been talking to Ben about doing.

Finishing the website is up there too. And as soon as we get into our first festival, I'll be releasing a new trailer too.


The only bad news is we may not have any DVDs to dish out until late 2011 because of festival policies.


But the counter good news is that with the movie completed, I'll be focusing all my creative energy on that new project. It's been evading me, but I think I'll be able to get down and dirty with it once GOS is off my conscience.

...Outer Space

Had an interesting revelation when looking up the trailer on youtube.

When you search for "Getting Outer Space trailer" the other results that come up are for "Plan 9 From Outer Space," "It Came From Outer Space," "Teenagers From Outer Space," "I Married a Monster From Outer Space," and "Killer Clowns From Outer Space."

This is just awesome. And that's not sarcastic.

As many of you know, our title has been around well before the movie. It was one of the first things I came up with when I first wrote the short film back in 2005/2006. It's a great title. That's why I kept it. The idea behind it has always been the slight play on words with the first part being "Getting Out" which can then be sort of thought as "Getting Out to Space," which is what your motivation is when building a spaceship. Also, more straightforward is just thinking of "outer space" as an idea/goal/mindset that is obtained. In some ways the title is laying out the plot and that "outer space" is the end goal of the movie...whatever that may represent. This story has existed in probably 30 different conceptual forms in my head over the years, but it's always at its core been about someone building a spaceship as an emotional escape (because doing it for real is absurd...which is also what i like about it). So whether the ship literally takes off and the person literally "gets out" or not, the idea and process of building it is a distraction and escape from real world problems. The ship is both literally and metaphorically a vessel to escape the world.

In this iteration of the story it's also a theme with the father and Neil both leaving/trying to leave their current lives for something else. Escapism is a major theme.

But that's all to say why it's always been essential for me to spell out "Outer Space" rather than refer to more common shorthand of just "Space". The suggestion of "Out" is core to the whole title.

And apparently spelling out "Outer Space" in a title kind of puts you in this category of kitschy space movies. Particularly old fashioned black and white ones. Since most of the actual space references in the movie are inspired by retro sci-fi, this is really actually an awesome thing. It's the sort of thing you'd expect was intentional, but it actually never crossed my mind until now. But now when you search for movies with "outer space" in the title, our movie will be lumped in with these genre films which are the foundation for our visual/cultural interpretation of "space."

It's very cool to me.